#1  
Unread 05-14-2003, 09:10 AM
Dutch2
 
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Default How HMO's were created, In The Beginning

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the
Earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red
vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Creme
Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said "Yea,"
and woman said, "and another one with sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the figure that
man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane,
and combined them. And woman went from size 6 to size 20. And man increased his belt size from 34 inches to 48 inches.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."

And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side.
And man and woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in
which to cook them.

"And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken, fried steak so big it
needed it's own platter. And man gained more weight and his cholesterol went
through the roof.

God then brought running shoes so that his children might loose those extra
pounds.

And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil
changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the
flickering light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with
nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
thin chips and deep-fried them. And man gained more pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that man might consume fewer calories and still
satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said,
"You want fries with that?" And man replied, "Yea! and super size 'em."

And Satan said "It is good." And man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And then Satan created HMOs.

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  #2  
Unread 05-15-2003, 01:08 AM
sonny
 
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Default RE: How HMO's were created, In The Beginning

VERY cute, thanks for my morning chuckle.
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  #3  
Unread 05-15-2003, 01:59 AM
ritaanz
 
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Default RE: How HMO's were created, In The Beginning

Oh dear. I thought it was Hilary Clinton.
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  #4  
Unread 05-15-2003, 03:15 AM
deez
 
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Default RE: How HMO's were created, In The Beginning

I work in a natural health foods market where the employees choice for lunch is either thed Wendy's across the street, the Mcdonald's down the block or the Burger King across the street from that.
Nuff said.
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  #5  
Unread 05-15-2003, 03:16 AM
lorrie
 
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Default RE: How HMO's were created, In The Beginning

Thanks for the truly enjoyable laugh of the day!
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